Making Friends

35th of Readying 383ONT, Foredeck of the Champions Boot

Willhym looked over at Baker and Robinson as they prepared for Aurellia to take them through the loading regime once more.

“Robinson will collect the ammunition he is the loader; Baker will operate the ram rod; and Willhym will measure the powder and sight it in… any questions?” they shook their heads as the Master Gunner as she prepared to run them through it.

“Master Gunner?” the voice came from behind, it was Bosun Fargazer “Officers are needed on the Bridge” he continued. Aurellia looked over the men as she grabbed her pack

“Mr. Tyre, please run them through a loading three times… do not fire, just load and unload”

“Aye Aye Master Gunner” he said with a relaxed salute and a wink… he was rewarded with her rolling her eyes and walking off to follow Flitt.

“Mr. Tyre… Load my cannon” Baker said in a mocking voice after she left

“Trouble with Ouellette?” Willhym asked

“Now guys, let’s just finish our exercises” Robinson said

“No trouble…” Baker threw back ignoring Robinson “Someone just seems to enjoy taking orders from the woman” he said. Willhym raised an eyebrow before responding

“You don’t?” he asked

“No!” Baker said in a hurry “Women shouldn’t be in charge”

“HA!” Bakers face began to turn red as Willhym laughed in face “You poor fool…”

“You some kind of women lover?” Baker growled, it was hard for Willhym to suppress a snicker as he responded

“Yes… absolutely…" Baker face turned red at the jab as Willhym continued "… I say promote them all Craw, every last one of them… nothing hotter then saluting a lady in power… they always get me standing at attention” he elbowed Robinson as he spoke, both he and Craw looked distinctly uncomfortable, if that bothered Willhym he didn’t show it “If you haven’t gotten a blow job from a superior officer… well Craw you’re just letting the best in life pass you by” his eyes drifted toward the Master Gunner climbing the ladder up to the Bridge and nodded to himself. Craw interrupted whatever daydream he was having

“That’s just wrong, this whole thing is wrong” Willhym fixed him a long stare and nodded sagely

“I get it… you’re sly… you’d rather just a ship full of fellows… well if that’s what floats your boat I suppose that’s fair and all”

“I really think we should be loading the Bombard” Robinson added in again, sounding worried about how this was escalating he reached a large lead ball and hefted it trying to encourage them to follow suit

“You calling me Sly… I’ll kill you for that, women don’t belong on a ship, that dosn’t mean i don’t want to sleep with them… I ought to cut that tongue out of you stupid face…” the rage in Bakers face showed he was not kidding as he whispered the threat and leaned over the Halfling menacingly, Bakers hand was drifting towards the large knife at his belt


Baker gulped in surprise at how fast that pepperbox sprung from the Halfling’s hip and was jammed hard into his belly, all mirth had vanished from Willhyms eyes and now he was met with a deadly serious gaze, the kind of gaze that said he didn’t care what happened next… the halfling would be fine

“Ok, let’s do this Baker… I’ll be your huckleberry.” Willhym said is a long slow drawl as he pushed the gun into Bakers ribs, surely leaving a bruise

“Gentlemen… let’s not do anything hasty… let’s all calm down” Robinson said, worry evident in his voice

“Nothin hasty needs be done, I thought we was having a chin wag, but this fellow here wanted a duel instead… I loves me a good duel… are we dueling Craw? Are we” he jabbed the barrel again to accent his point, Craw grimaced knowing if he moved at all to stop the Halfling the trigger would be pulled and he would be dead.

“Baker didn’t mean anything by that… he was just joking Willhym, Bakers a real joker… aren’t you Baker?” Robinson offered, trying desperately to defuse the situation… eight officers on the ship and of course none could be found when you needed one

“Oh… my bad… were you joking Baker? were you?” Willhym asked in a thick tone of sarcasm. Baker said nothing but nodded his assent. Willhym continued “HA… HA… HA…” he said the words with no tone of jest. He said them abnormally loudly giving a little chill to the air. “My bad…” his pepper box made a click as he uncocked it “we still don’t know each other yet… I didn’t know you were joking” and like that the gleam of mischief returned to his eyes “Friends?” he said holstering the pepperbox and holding out his hand with a ridiculously friendly tone. Baker looked enraged but Robinson elbowed him hard in the back

“Friends” he murmured through gritted teeth

“I’m so glad” Willhym said the sarcasm back… “Now load the fucking cannon asshole"



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